Thursday, April 16, 2009

Airport Chronicles Part Tres- Implants!

I was working my usual weekend night at the airport when this woman comes into my store. It "sounds" as if she's talking on a blue tooth because she's having quite the conversation, but as she turns around I notice, no blue tooth or phone-she's talking to herself! Odd?! So I say "hello" and tell her if she needs anything to let me know.
Within the time she was in the store I started coughing really hard. She comes up behind me, asking if I'm OK and pats me on the back, then grabs me by the shoulder to pull me back and starts patting my chest. I'm alarmed that she's doing this, and nicely push her hands away telling her that I'm OK, and enough.... She stops then looks at me, starts grabbing my arms and hips and makes a comment about "having a sturdy frame", that I have some "big hips" and what am I in hips, a 36"? " Look at her blankly and say "huh?" She then pats my chest and says "but your sorta built like a 12 yr old boy up here, have you ever thought about getting implants?" I look at her more intensely and say "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" "no," she says, " you'd have a really rockin' body if you had more up here to even out your hips. Has anyone ever suggested implants to you before?" Shuttering and chuckling a bit I say "I haven't had any complaints so far.." "Oh, well have a good night now!" she waves as she leaves my store and I'm standing there stunned.
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