Friday, November 30, 2007

Locker Room Conversations

I work out 5 days a week at the Electronics Company gym and so far it’s been uneventful until recently.

Last Wednesday- I usually don’t talk to anyone while I’m working out because, well, I’m working out…
A coworker comes up to me on while I’m on the elliptical and says…
Coworker: Hey K! What are you doing?
Me: Hey, working out, you too?
Coworker: Yeah, so I was going to ask you about a work related thing…can I ask you now?
Me: Um, no…I’m working out right now…
Coworker: OK, well it’ll just take a minute…
Me: I’m working out, we can set aside some time later today, but I’m working out so…
Coworker: Really? You can’t just give me 2 minutes?
Me: It is “a fire”?
Coworker: No..
Me: Then nope, We’ll talk about it later…thanks, and have a good workout!
She stands there for a couple of minutes not believing I just blew her off, before she walks away.

Tuesday- I’m done working out and am changing my clothes in the back. This 40-something woman comes back and stops right in front of me on her cell phone. I’m naked-changing my clothes and this chick is holding a conversation about her ailing father hanging over me by 5 inches….I’m feeling stared at and… vulnerable
Me: Hey, back the hell up..
Stoopid Woman on her Cell: Wait a minute- What?
Me: I said, back the hell up..
Stoopid Woman on her Cell: I’m not..
Me: OK, get the fuck off me and out of here if you’re going to be on that thing OK? This is a locker room not a fucking phone booth, I’m also not particularly interested in the health of your get the hell away from me.
Stoopid Woman on her Cell: fine, screw you!
Me: Yeah, with a stick!

Wednesday- I’m done working out and am changing my clothes and decided to blow dry my hair…There is a 20-something girl changing her clothes and talking on her cell-loudly…I start blow drying my hair and…
Stoopid Chick on her Cell: Hey! I’m on the phone, can you turn that off?!
Me: Turning up the blow dryer to high, and looking straight at her…expressionless..
Stoopid Chick on her Cell: Hey! I said turn that off, I’m on the phone!
Me: Still looking at her, yelling loudly-What? I’m sorry, I can’t hear you!
Stoopid Chick on her Cell: Hey! Hey! (she ends her conversation and goes to workout)

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