Sunday, April 02, 2006

Restless in my Mind....

It's crappy and rainy today and I'm feeling a bit restless. I am still getting over being sick and am getting a bit frustrated over the house. I sit in my house and look at all of the stuff I have yet to do. Finish painting the living room and upstairs hallway, painting the entryway, buying blinds for the large upper window, painting the mural on the back living room wall, hanging curtains on the large upper window, putting the legs on my sectional and running my lamp cord under it so there's enough light in the living room, putting the stair railings back up, buying a couple of lighted ceiling fans and having them wired and installed. Pisses me off that I don't have the money to do half of it yet. My taxes are coming in the next month and it will all go to my credit card. The winter heating bills this year were nasty. I'm hoping in the next year I will be able to buy a new car (my baby is slowly dying!), refinance, transfer to St. Kate's to finish my degree.

Talking about degrees, this short story class is kicking my ass! I've been so lazy and procrastinator which is not like me at all. During this little sick period I've managed to miss another damn quiz. I'm supposed to make it up this week and I just took my mid-term last Tuesday. I've done C-B work but need a B or better to have it help my GPA at all. I've been looking at classes for Summer 1 and Summer 2 and there's nothing. I can't beleive the crap there is to choose from and all the classes are 4 hours long 2-3 days a week. I know it sounds lame that I'm complaining about it, but I'm taking a class that's 4 hours long 1 night a week and have vowed never to do it again. No one wants to participate and the Prof ends up picking me all the time, no thanks. Can't wait until I get my degree! With talk of all this degree crap, work and all of that has been a bit frustrating as well. Seems that I'll never be able to go above being an Admin. practically everthing in my dept needs a college degree and the pay that comes with having one and the work that's involved is a joke really. I've watched friends of mine become overworked and angry that they are the only ones who do that type of job and the bank refuses to hire anyone else. Same case with P. They obviously need more people but refuse to hire them. I don't get it. My g-friend Laurie was probably right in leaving. She just got married in August and spent more time at work than with her husband, the work was making her sick and I know she didn't like to travel as much as we have to. I do love my job, but if I was married I'd have a hell of a time, if I had children it would be worse considering it is unheard of for me to get home before 8:00p. It just makes me wonder, what am I doing all this for? Will be able to retire early?-no, will I be able to have the life I want?-most likely no. I find my self getting a bit angry when I go out with my bosses and they talk about flying out to Florida every other weekend to spend time with their new b-friend or that they are going to rent an apartment for a weekend in Paris so their husband can compete in a bike race, or buying a $600,000 home off the lake for just themselves and their husband. I have a hard time spending $100. for a new cat, raising a couple grand to have the carpet in my house replaced, or buying a plane ticket to Boston to see my g-friend Cole get married.

To the things that really count in life-
Dana-I'm so sorry and if I can do anything......

This made me happy
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